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Responding to the Googling masses

September 04, 2013 by Russell Gawthorpe in Generalia, The Internet

I figured I'd do the internet a service, and answer some of the ridiculous things people have been searching for when they've landed on colonpipe.com. Maybe I'll enlighten someone to some damn thing: Q - v graphite flavour, what flavour is v graphite, what is v graphite maca?, graphite v flavour, v graphite tastes like, v energy graphite taste, what flavour is the new graphite v drink?, what does v graphite taste like?, what does v graohite taste like, v red graphite flavour, v graphite drink taste, what does v graphite taste like A - It tastes like spectacularly artificial chocolate. It's also got ingredients in it that could give you goitres. (Or make them worse if you have them already.) Red V is no longer made, but it was berry flavoured and I believe it contained actual fruit (or berry) juice.

Q - star trek into darkness nazi uniforms, star trek into darkness uniform+nazi A - Yes, they looked a lot like Nazi uniforms. But hey, they were cool. (The Star Trek ones. Not the Nazi ones.) ... (No, actually, the Nazi ones were pretty cool too. I mean, come on. For an army of pure evil, they were pretty snappy dressers.)

Q - why are australians good actors, differences in acting in usa and australia, cant act A - They're not, and the difference is that the former can, and the latter cannot.

Q - what does green storm mother taste like?, how is green mother storm different, green storm mother taste like, mother green storm what caffeine A - It tastes a lot like regular Mother. It's different in that it contains natural caffeine (as opposed to test-tube caffeine), and it comes in a green can. What caffeine? WHAT CAFFEINE?!

Q - sharktopus movie.girl.in bikini with metal dectetor.who is she, girl on beach with metal detector in sharktopus A - Pretty.sure.she.isn't.a.girl.  That person is to 'girl' as Sharktopus is to 'film'.

Q - am i a synesthete? A - Dunno. Can you taste music? See sounds? Fart chipotle?

Q - why shouldn't i answer calls from blocked number A - Either you've got a psycho ex, or you're dodging debt collectors. Answer the phone.

Q - pimp full form of irc in computer A - DON'T MAKE ME ASSUME MY FULL FORM. It's pimp. And it's in IRC. /me assumes form

Q -water in colon porn extreme A - Yeah. I hope you found what you were looking for. Somewhere else.

Q -instagram vintage effect ruined, rare hipstamatic combos A - I agree. Also, c-c-combo breaker.

Q -mentally retarded dopey A - Snow White was an equal-opportunity employer.

Q - strangest places trampoline been found A - ...Cletus?

Q - electric colon porn A - I'm picturing extension cords in places I don't want to picture extension cords. Thank you for that.

Q - science hero action figures volume 3 A - Not yet. Patience, grasshopper.

September 04, 2013 /Russell Gawthorpe
Google, searchstrings, STOP BEING SO STUPID, stupid things people say
Generalia, The Internet
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